I used to be very shy and unsure of myself in almost every setting – school, work, social events, even at home with my family. I think something that really made a difference was working on myself and boosting my self-confidence through understanding my strengths. I used to put myself down a lot and my mindset was pretty negative. I was lucky to find a friend who told me I needed to start positive self-talk and affirmations. I identified my strengths and used these as affirmations when I began to become self-critical or unsure of myself. Fall is the perfect time to start introspecting as we begin to go inside and cozy up on long evenings. I challenge you to spend one of these nights identifying your negative self-talk and finding your own personal strengths. Write out an affirmation and make it a point to say to yourself out loud “I am so (insert strength here) and I can (desirable action). Grab a journal and a pen and lets get to some self-work….
Strengths Exploration
Individuals who feel like they understand their strengths and use them to their advantage tend to have more life benefits than those who do not. They feel happier, they have increased self-esteem, and they tend to accomplish their goals. Let’s start by getting clear on what your strengths are. Some of your personal strengths might be really clear to you, whereas others might go unnoticed. Here is a list of potential strengths that you might possess, write down the ones that resonate with you. You might also ask a friend or family member what they think your strengths are, you might be surprised!
- Adventurousness
- Logic
- Intelligence
- Spirituality
- Patience
- Forgiveness
- Social Awareness
- Persistence
- Leadership
- Curiosity
- Open Mindedness
- Love
- Cooperation
- Self-Control
- Humor
- Confidence
- Assertiveness
- Flexibility
- Independence
- Discipline
- Creativity
- Love of Learning
- Common Sense
- Bravery
- Kindness
- Honesty
- Artistic Ability
- Wisdom
- Empathy
- Enthusiasm
- Fairness
- Modesty
- Gratitude
- Ambition
- Athleticism
- Optimism
Now that you have your strengths identified, lets work on how these strengths can help shape your self-talk for the better! Something that can start to build your self-confidence is exploring how your strengths help you in certain situations and roles. Lets take work for example:
*List the strengths you possess that help you in your current job
*Describe a specific time your strengths were able to help you in your role at that job
*Describe two new ways you could use your strengths in your current job
You can do this exercise for so many other roles including:
husband/wife, father/mother, manager, colleague, team member, sports player, community leader, or friend.
I like this exercise because it explores the “what if” of a situation and helps you to see the positive in those events that may have made you unsure of yourself and nervous in the past. Re-framing your negative thoughts into recognizing your strengths instead helps you with that confidence boost.
I hope that this post helped you in gaining confidence or shifting your mindset in a positive direction. You have so many unique strengths and abilities that only you can provide, and you’ve identified how you can use your unique strengths to make your life and the lives of those around you just a little bit brighter.
-AA
Amber Adaline 